I have been sick all Memorial Day weekend so I am finally coming out of my cough/pneumonia haze and what do I find dominating the blogs -- photos of Nene and Greg Leakes from RHOA at a charity event in the ATL. It appears to me that we see this pair photographed together more after their divorce than they were when they were married.
Now I don't know if they are dating, good friends or if it was a divorce of convenience (one rumor floating is that the divorce was to avoid Greg's business debt impacting Nene's new rich ways). What I do know is that this celeb couple reflects what a lot of people have found to be true -- that after breaking up and stepping back out into the dating game sometimes your best match is your ex.
Here are a few reasons why it is not always a bad thing to try to work that old thing out:
You Already Know
You've probably heard the saying that says something like it is better to "deal with the devil you know..." I think when it comes to the ex it is easier because you already know what you liked and what you disliked. You've done the work already to discover things that can be worked on and things that just are what they are. The focus is less on getting to know and understand you and more on how can we both the get the best out of this situation.
Shared Circle
Many of your interests, friends, family and professional circles are already mixing. People get you too as a couple and if things didn't end to dramatically more then likely your circle is your biggest cheerleader for working things out. It is hard to introduce someone new to people who liked or maybe even loved your ex. You'd be amazed how much what the circle thinks forces people to make major love decisions.
Lazy Love
This one is the ABSOLUTE truth ---- people are lazy when it comes to love! We'd like to think people are putting in the work, research and grinding away every minute of the day to make love fresh, but the truth is love lives generally get the least amount of planning and attention. This laziness makes the ex attractive because we jump the whole appearing perfect stage of dating and are able to reveal our true selves. The ex gets that you don't shave your legs in the winter or that it takes a big glass of red wine for you to be sane in the evenings. There is something attractive about a person who just seems to get you ---- easily.
LaDawn Black is a relationship expert, author and media personality. Cocoa Mommalicious is her forum for sharing tales from the mommy lines, love lines and life lines. For more information visit www.ladawnblack.com .
Wednesday, May 30, 2012
Friday, May 25, 2012
Really Dude You Are a ......
Last night I was hosting a party and while I was getting my things and getting out of the car a guy rides up next to me in a beautiful convertible 6 series BMW. The kind of car that you simply cannot miss. I saw the car and did an internal "OOH" and continued on gathering my things to go into the party. While I was finishing up, the guy opens and closes the convertible top on the car while talking loud on his cell phone about his "business deals." He gives me a quick "hi" and I say hi back, but I keep it moving into the event that I am already running a bit late for.
While in the party the guy finds me and keeps saying "hi." It is awkward because I have already said hi to him and I am wondering --- are you at a loss for words or is this really all the game that you have? I have been married for a while now; so maybe I am not quite as patient with men when they are trying to get their game up. I want to scream so bad "dude what is it that you want!?!?"
On my way out after the event I am talking to the security guard at the door about an intricate tattoo that he has on his arm. My brother loves tattoos so whenever I see someone with some great ink I love to ask about where they got it done and why. While talking to the security guard, BMW dude says "hi" yet again. By now I have tired of him and I just nod and keep on with my conversation about tattoos with security.
Why did I hear BMW guy say to his friend --- "she talking to security. Did she see what I pulled up in?" Really dude!?! Maybe for some women your ability to spread out the payments on an expensive car and push a button to raise and lower the top is enough to have them fawn over you, but I tend to be drawn to people that are interesting. Dude was not interesting. He was a jerk.
Is having expensive things really enough to get a woman's attention? Are we losing the ability to really flirt because of social media and cell phones?
Thoughts???
LaDawn Black is a relationship expert, author and media personality. Cocoa Mommalicious is her forum for sharing tales from the mommy lines, love lines and life lines. For more information visit www.ladawnblack.com .
While in the party the guy finds me and keeps saying "hi." It is awkward because I have already said hi to him and I am wondering --- are you at a loss for words or is this really all the game that you have? I have been married for a while now; so maybe I am not quite as patient with men when they are trying to get their game up. I want to scream so bad "dude what is it that you want!?!?"
On my way out after the event I am talking to the security guard at the door about an intricate tattoo that he has on his arm. My brother loves tattoos so whenever I see someone with some great ink I love to ask about where they got it done and why. While talking to the security guard, BMW dude says "hi" yet again. By now I have tired of him and I just nod and keep on with my conversation about tattoos with security.
Why did I hear BMW guy say to his friend --- "she talking to security. Did she see what I pulled up in?" Really dude!?! Maybe for some women your ability to spread out the payments on an expensive car and push a button to raise and lower the top is enough to have them fawn over you, but I tend to be drawn to people that are interesting. Dude was not interesting. He was a jerk.
Is having expensive things really enough to get a woman's attention? Are we losing the ability to really flirt because of social media and cell phones?
Thoughts???
LaDawn Black is a relationship expert, author and media personality. Cocoa Mommalicious is her forum for sharing tales from the mommy lines, love lines and life lines. For more information visit www.ladawnblack.com .
Thursday, May 24, 2012
Tameka Raymond I Feel Ya
Usher and Tameka Raymond's custody case is all over the blogs and everyone seems to want to talk about the outlandish courtroom behavior and dating/ hook-up habits. For me, however, the most interesting aspect of what has been leaked regarding the custody proceedings is the fact that Usher keeps referring to his ex as "Tameka Foster" when legally her name is still "Tameka Raymond." It was so bad that the judge had to admonish him to call her by the right name and to stop wasting the court's time trying to make a point.
Some of you may feel that a last name really isn't a big deal in a divorce; things like money, housing and kids take precedence. While those things are important I tend to think last name retention is tops too! My husband and I have discussed this issue a few times in our "what-if scenarios." He feels of course that if we were ever not together that I should go back to my maiden name and I have told him that that will never happen. My name is now my money and frankly I am what makes his last name fabulous :) I am siding with Tina Turner on this one. You can have everything else, but the name stays.
Here are a few reasons why women hold on to the marital name:
You've Established a Brand
Celebrity or not people know you personally and professionally by your married name. Why should you have to re-brand yourself simply because one aspect of your life didn't work out? Holding on to a last name can be simply a smart social/business decision.
Kid Connection
My aunt many years ago made a statement that as a child I thought was ridiculous, but now it makes a lot of sense. Someone asked her after her recent divorce why she still was going by her married name and she simply said "it is my son's name." As a kid I thought she was really sort of making a big deal out of nothing, but many years, a marriage and three kids later I see her point. Changing your last name for some women is almost saying that I didn't exist and our marriage didn't matter. There is a sort of "legitimacy" in keeping the last name because even years after the marriage is over it says: this wasn't a fling and my kids were planned for and wanted.
Fair Game
My life and history will forever be attached to you whether I like it or not. Some women see the retention of the name as the ultimate "keeping it real" in that this is who they have become after all these years and to change the name would mean to try to fit back into a persona that they long ago gave up. Also, you can't run away from what is or in this case -- what was. People will always on some level associate you with your ex and it is going to take a lot more than going back to your maiden name to move on from a relationship that has ended.
Agree or disagree? Let me know ........
LaDawn Black is a relationship expert, author and media personality. Cocoa Mommalicious is her forum for sharing tales from the mommy lines, love lines and life lines. For more information visit www.ladawnblack.com .
Some of you may feel that a last name really isn't a big deal in a divorce; things like money, housing and kids take precedence. While those things are important I tend to think last name retention is tops too! My husband and I have discussed this issue a few times in our "what-if scenarios." He feels of course that if we were ever not together that I should go back to my maiden name and I have told him that that will never happen. My name is now my money and frankly I am what makes his last name fabulous :) I am siding with Tina Turner on this one. You can have everything else, but the name stays.
Here are a few reasons why women hold on to the marital name:
You've Established a Brand
Celebrity or not people know you personally and professionally by your married name. Why should you have to re-brand yourself simply because one aspect of your life didn't work out? Holding on to a last name can be simply a smart social/business decision.
Kid Connection
My aunt many years ago made a statement that as a child I thought was ridiculous, but now it makes a lot of sense. Someone asked her after her recent divorce why she still was going by her married name and she simply said "it is my son's name." As a kid I thought she was really sort of making a big deal out of nothing, but many years, a marriage and three kids later I see her point. Changing your last name for some women is almost saying that I didn't exist and our marriage didn't matter. There is a sort of "legitimacy" in keeping the last name because even years after the marriage is over it says: this wasn't a fling and my kids were planned for and wanted.
Fair Game
My life and history will forever be attached to you whether I like it or not. Some women see the retention of the name as the ultimate "keeping it real" in that this is who they have become after all these years and to change the name would mean to try to fit back into a persona that they long ago gave up. Also, you can't run away from what is or in this case -- what was. People will always on some level associate you with your ex and it is going to take a lot more than going back to your maiden name to move on from a relationship that has ended.
Agree or disagree? Let me know ........
LaDawn Black is a relationship expert, author and media personality. Cocoa Mommalicious is her forum for sharing tales from the mommy lines, love lines and life lines. For more information visit www.ladawnblack.com .
Wednesday, May 23, 2012
Yes She Can!
One of the things that I learned early on first with my son and now with my girls is that kids have the ability to be your biggest joy and also your biggest embarrassment. It is universal as a parent you discover something new that your child can do and then you brag on it and when the child is called on to do it ---- they don't --- and you look crazy.
With my son it was the basics. "He can talk" and he wouldn't. "Watch him dance" and he would promptly sit down and stare into space when the music came on. It was almost like he took joy in making us look foolish in front of friends and family because on several occasions as soon as his audience turned their backs or left the room he would "genius" up again.
Now having twins has kicked this dynamic up a few levels. People are fascinated with what they are able to do. Do they have a secret language? Are they developing at the same rate? Where are they similar and what is different about them? A few days ago I fell back into this trap because after ten years with no baby I simply forgot the great baby switch up.
I was out shopping and a lady stopped me telling me that she had twin adult daughters. She said "are they really into just each other and no one else?" "No" I quickly retorted. In my nine months with my girls I have found that they are both friendly and engaging babies. They soak up all the attention that being new babies and twins gets them.
The lady feeling encouraged bends over the stroller where Ava my oldest (2 minutes) shuts her eyes tightly and turns her head to the side and my peanut Bella opens her eyes wide like one of those spooky old fashioned dolls and places her lips together and starts to spit. I try to coo them into being friendly or at the very least to open their eyes and stop spitting and my efforts fail big time as my "friendly" babies give every indication that this stranger would be best suited to get out of their faces right now.
The woman backed up from the stroller and gave me the seasoned mom "you better fix that now face." As she walked away, I glared into the stroller and Ava opened her eyes and smiled and Bella broke into a smile and cut off the sprinkler system. They were happy babies again that had made their point --- we run this! They took advantage of my long infant mommy break and I fell into their trap. Yes, ladies you won that one, but trust your mom is back in the game now!
Alec (my 10 yr old) Quote of the Day:
He's been out sick from school for a few days. At my wits end with how the cold medicine is doing absolutely nothing I decide to just disinfect everything: bedding, carpet and him. Nothing like a warm shower to sometimes make you feel a bit better.
After the shower ......
Me: Do you feel better?
Alec: No, I feel clean tho.
The boy is honest :)
LaDawn Black is a relationship expert, author and media personality. Cocoa Mommalicious is her forum for sharing tales from the mommy lines, love lines and life lines. For more information visit www.ladawnblack.com .
With my son it was the basics. "He can talk" and he wouldn't. "Watch him dance" and he would promptly sit down and stare into space when the music came on. It was almost like he took joy in making us look foolish in front of friends and family because on several occasions as soon as his audience turned their backs or left the room he would "genius" up again.
Now having twins has kicked this dynamic up a few levels. People are fascinated with what they are able to do. Do they have a secret language? Are they developing at the same rate? Where are they similar and what is different about them? A few days ago I fell back into this trap because after ten years with no baby I simply forgot the great baby switch up.
I was out shopping and a lady stopped me telling me that she had twin adult daughters. She said "are they really into just each other and no one else?" "No" I quickly retorted. In my nine months with my girls I have found that they are both friendly and engaging babies. They soak up all the attention that being new babies and twins gets them.
The lady feeling encouraged bends over the stroller where Ava my oldest (2 minutes) shuts her eyes tightly and turns her head to the side and my peanut Bella opens her eyes wide like one of those spooky old fashioned dolls and places her lips together and starts to spit. I try to coo them into being friendly or at the very least to open their eyes and stop spitting and my efforts fail big time as my "friendly" babies give every indication that this stranger would be best suited to get out of their faces right now.
The woman backed up from the stroller and gave me the seasoned mom "you better fix that now face." As she walked away, I glared into the stroller and Ava opened her eyes and smiled and Bella broke into a smile and cut off the sprinkler system. They were happy babies again that had made their point --- we run this! They took advantage of my long infant mommy break and I fell into their trap. Yes, ladies you won that one, but trust your mom is back in the game now!
Alec (my 10 yr old) Quote of the Day:
He's been out sick from school for a few days. At my wits end with how the cold medicine is doing absolutely nothing I decide to just disinfect everything: bedding, carpet and him. Nothing like a warm shower to sometimes make you feel a bit better.
After the shower ......
Me: Do you feel better?
Alec: No, I feel clean tho.
The boy is honest :)
LaDawn Black is a relationship expert, author and media personality. Cocoa Mommalicious is her forum for sharing tales from the mommy lines, love lines and life lines. For more information visit www.ladawnblack.com .
Is Change Possible?
Recently an NFL player with 10 kids by 8 different women was accused of cheating by his wife. As I read the various news stories about the situation, one thing that most bloggers and commenters were saying is that she should have expected the cheat based on his
pre-marriage behavior that produced the many kids and baby mamas. Is that fair? Can't a person change?
We tackled this question on my radio show last night. Most people felt that once a cheater always a cheater and that it is next to impossible for a person to change who they are. Personally, I don't believe that that is true. I think we have the power to change those things we choose to change. The trick is that you can't make a person change and a person cannot change for you -- true change is self-driven.
So before you throw that well-travelled, cheating or questionable fish back, here are a few clues that they may actually be able to change:
They Fess Up
If a person is able to admit and discuss with you where they went wrong and they take full responsibility for their actions then they are on the path to making things right.
Know Their Triggers
They know what makes them behave badly and they try to avoid these places, people and situations.
Subtle Changes in Other Areas
There is an overall life renovation going on. They seem to be connecting to their spirit, rededicating themselves to family or pursuing more positive endeavors. Once a person realizes the power they have to change things, they often make moves to change other areas in their life where they feel things need to improve.
For more tips on how to tell if a cheater has changed. Check out my article for Match.com.
LaDawn Black is a relationship expert, author and media personality. Cocoa Mommalicious is her forum for sharing tales from the mommy lines, love lines and life lines. For more information visit www.ladawnblack.com .
pre-marriage behavior that produced the many kids and baby mamas. Is that fair? Can't a person change?
We tackled this question on my radio show last night. Most people felt that once a cheater always a cheater and that it is next to impossible for a person to change who they are. Personally, I don't believe that that is true. I think we have the power to change those things we choose to change. The trick is that you can't make a person change and a person cannot change for you -- true change is self-driven.
So before you throw that well-travelled, cheating or questionable fish back, here are a few clues that they may actually be able to change:
They Fess Up
If a person is able to admit and discuss with you where they went wrong and they take full responsibility for their actions then they are on the path to making things right.
Know Their Triggers
They know what makes them behave badly and they try to avoid these places, people and situations.
Subtle Changes in Other Areas
There is an overall life renovation going on. They seem to be connecting to their spirit, rededicating themselves to family or pursuing more positive endeavors. Once a person realizes the power they have to change things, they often make moves to change other areas in their life where they feel things need to improve.
For more tips on how to tell if a cheater has changed. Check out my article for Match.com.
LaDawn Black is a relationship expert, author and media personality. Cocoa Mommalicious is her forum for sharing tales from the mommy lines, love lines and life lines. For more information visit www.ladawnblack.com .
Tuesday, May 22, 2012
My Stretchmarks Are Mad at Beyonce
People are still debating whether or not Beyonce actually gave birth to Blue Ivy. Blue's birth has had so many stories that it is hard to really pin down what is true and what is hype machine. I thought the debate was over when Beyonce went to Tumblr and posted a few preggo pics, but people went in on those as staged and fake.
After the Met Gala in NY a week ago the talk started again when Beyonce rocked a beautiful see through dress. The chorus of "she did not carry that baby" was reignited. It has been so bad that Beyonce's mom has even started to give interviews trying to convince the world that her daughter gave birth. All I can say is --- Beyonce needs more people.
Now personally I don't care if she actually carried the baby or not. Modern science has been a wonderful tool for allowing women who may have not been moms thirty years ago the chance to realize that dream. Surrogacy is a wonderful way to experience your very own biological baby when adoption or no children at all may have been your only options. If Beyonce chose to use a surrogate, then more power to her. However, be real about it and tell us or make the ruse more believable by simply not saying anything at all.
Here are four reasons why I think B may not be telling the truth:
Pregnant Bellies Don't Fold
I have been pregnant twice and pregnant bellies move, stretch and bulge; they don't fold. Early on in her pregnancy when she was on the talk show and she sat and her belly folded in half. I was baffled. Pillows fold not babies.
Forget Your Flop-flops??
I was the queen of wearing heels while pregnant. Even when pregnant with my twin girls I was rocking 5 inches for as long as I could. However, any pregnant woman will tell you that around month number seven you get heavy no matter how much weight you have gained and you cannot see your feet. Add to that the swelling and the idea of squeezing into a pair of heels not only becomes impossible in some cases, but also ridiculous. For those lucky enough to wear heels up to the day the baby is born you see a heaviness and a carefulness to their walk (see recent pics of RHOA's Kim Zolciak). B was light as air in her heels up to the day the birth was announced. Why didn't we catch you in your flip-flops in any pics while pregnant? There are tons of pics of you now carefully walking with Blue in flats around NYC --- was there no need for this caution a few months ago when you were expecting?
Get Candid
You are one of the biggest celebs in the world and there were really no candid shots of you in the city walking around pregnant. Just think of all the shots of Mariah Carey, Alicia Keys and the non-stop candids of Jessica Simpson. These casual shots were pictures that looked like all pregnant women out there --- trying to get things done, trying to stay stylish and trying to make it to the end of this pregnancy. You felt for them in a way we didn't really feel for B because she didn't have one shot that all of us pregnant girls have --- the "when is this going to be over because I am really big and tired" --- money shot.
You Are Trying to Convince Us Too Much
All the articles about losing weight and how joyful you were while pregnant are not convincing us. If you carried your baby, then rest in your knowledge and stop trying to convince the public into believing it. Take a clue from Nicole Kidman. Her first pregnancy was deeply questioned because she showed up one week to an award show thin and a few days later sporting a gigantic belly. People were questioning openly whether or not she was ever actually pregnant. She chose to not discuss it and a few years later when baby two arrived literally out of nowhere nobody even cared to ask. Sometimes the best way to answer your critics is to not answer them at all.
In the end, Blue is here and the true Beyonce fans are in love with her! However, I did have to step up for the pregnant ladies out there and say that the critics may have a case. The question of whether or not Beyonce was pregnant will be one of the questions that will go down in time like "was that Steve Harvey's hair" or "what is really under Neyo's hat?" We may never know, but it is fun to try to figure it all out.
LaDawn Black is a relationship expert, author and media personality. Cocoa Mommalicious is her forum for sharing tales from the mommy lines, love lines and life lines. For more information visit www.ladawnblack.com .
After the Met Gala in NY a week ago the talk started again when Beyonce rocked a beautiful see through dress. The chorus of "she did not carry that baby" was reignited. It has been so bad that Beyonce's mom has even started to give interviews trying to convince the world that her daughter gave birth. All I can say is --- Beyonce needs more people.
Now personally I don't care if she actually carried the baby or not. Modern science has been a wonderful tool for allowing women who may have not been moms thirty years ago the chance to realize that dream. Surrogacy is a wonderful way to experience your very own biological baby when adoption or no children at all may have been your only options. If Beyonce chose to use a surrogate, then more power to her. However, be real about it and tell us or make the ruse more believable by simply not saying anything at all.
Here are four reasons why I think B may not be telling the truth:
Pregnant Bellies Don't Fold
I have been pregnant twice and pregnant bellies move, stretch and bulge; they don't fold. Early on in her pregnancy when she was on the talk show and she sat and her belly folded in half. I was baffled. Pillows fold not babies.
Forget Your Flop-flops??
I was the queen of wearing heels while pregnant. Even when pregnant with my twin girls I was rocking 5 inches for as long as I could. However, any pregnant woman will tell you that around month number seven you get heavy no matter how much weight you have gained and you cannot see your feet. Add to that the swelling and the idea of squeezing into a pair of heels not only becomes impossible in some cases, but also ridiculous. For those lucky enough to wear heels up to the day the baby is born you see a heaviness and a carefulness to their walk (see recent pics of RHOA's Kim Zolciak). B was light as air in her heels up to the day the birth was announced. Why didn't we catch you in your flip-flops in any pics while pregnant? There are tons of pics of you now carefully walking with Blue in flats around NYC --- was there no need for this caution a few months ago when you were expecting?
Get Candid
You are one of the biggest celebs in the world and there were really no candid shots of you in the city walking around pregnant. Just think of all the shots of Mariah Carey, Alicia Keys and the non-stop candids of Jessica Simpson. These casual shots were pictures that looked like all pregnant women out there --- trying to get things done, trying to stay stylish and trying to make it to the end of this pregnancy. You felt for them in a way we didn't really feel for B because she didn't have one shot that all of us pregnant girls have --- the "when is this going to be over because I am really big and tired" --- money shot.
You Are Trying to Convince Us Too Much
All the articles about losing weight and how joyful you were while pregnant are not convincing us. If you carried your baby, then rest in your knowledge and stop trying to convince the public into believing it. Take a clue from Nicole Kidman. Her first pregnancy was deeply questioned because she showed up one week to an award show thin and a few days later sporting a gigantic belly. People were questioning openly whether or not she was ever actually pregnant. She chose to not discuss it and a few years later when baby two arrived literally out of nowhere nobody even cared to ask. Sometimes the best way to answer your critics is to not answer them at all.
In the end, Blue is here and the true Beyonce fans are in love with her! However, I did have to step up for the pregnant ladies out there and say that the critics may have a case. The question of whether or not Beyonce was pregnant will be one of the questions that will go down in time like "was that Steve Harvey's hair" or "what is really under Neyo's hat?" We may never know, but it is fun to try to figure it all out.
LaDawn Black is a relationship expert, author and media personality. Cocoa Mommalicious is her forum for sharing tales from the mommy lines, love lines and life lines. For more information visit www.ladawnblack.com .
Don't Do a Ray J in Love
Ray J has had a sorted run when it comes to love: sex tape, redemption, older woman love and now .... possible pariah. Ray J was the last man in Whitney's life before she died. Apparently, there was some background drama at the Billboard Awards the other night when Whitney Houston's family wanted his seat moved away from them. Ray J does not appear to be well liked by the Houston family.
This is not anything new. All of us can look back and see instances where our pick in love was not necessarily the pick of our family. I remember dating a guy and he was bold enough ask my parents "did they not like him?" My mom quickly interjected "No we do not" and left the room to go back to washing her dishes. I tried for nearly two years to get them to see him the same way I did and they never did and the truth is that after nearly two years together and much drama I saw what my parents saw all along and I grew to not like him either.
So what do you do when your family clearly hates the person that you are seeing?? Keep these three things in mind:
Are They Telling the Truth?
You have to be mature and see if the things that the family is pointing out are true. Love can sometimes cloud your judgement and your family can at times see your lover far more clearly than you. If there are concrete reasons why your family is concerned, then maybe it is time to be receptive to what your family is saying and make some hard decisions.
Is Your Lover Trying to Get You Away from Your Family?
One clear sign of someone who may be up to no good is when they try to get you away from people who have always been in your corner. This is a sign that the person wants to control you and they are aware that your family sees the real deal and they want you to be shielded from this reality. If you are alone then you are easy to manipulate and you only have the manipulator to rely on.
Be Honest About State of Love
In the end only the two people in the relationship know what is truly going on so you have to put on your big girl/guy pants and assess your love. If the relationship is working for you and people are simply hating for their own personal reasons, then keep doing you. However, if when you close your eyes at night you see some of the things that your family continues to point out to you and secretly you think they may have a point then don't run away from their disdain --- embrace it as a warning sign that things can get much worse and it is time to get out now!
LaDawn Black is a relationship expert, author and media personality. Cocoa Mommalicious is her forum for sharing tales from the mommy lines, love lines and life lines. For more information visit www.ladawnblack.com .
This is not anything new. All of us can look back and see instances where our pick in love was not necessarily the pick of our family. I remember dating a guy and he was bold enough ask my parents "did they not like him?" My mom quickly interjected "No we do not" and left the room to go back to washing her dishes. I tried for nearly two years to get them to see him the same way I did and they never did and the truth is that after nearly two years together and much drama I saw what my parents saw all along and I grew to not like him either.
So what do you do when your family clearly hates the person that you are seeing?? Keep these three things in mind:
Are They Telling the Truth?
You have to be mature and see if the things that the family is pointing out are true. Love can sometimes cloud your judgement and your family can at times see your lover far more clearly than you. If there are concrete reasons why your family is concerned, then maybe it is time to be receptive to what your family is saying and make some hard decisions.
Is Your Lover Trying to Get You Away from Your Family?
One clear sign of someone who may be up to no good is when they try to get you away from people who have always been in your corner. This is a sign that the person wants to control you and they are aware that your family sees the real deal and they want you to be shielded from this reality. If you are alone then you are easy to manipulate and you only have the manipulator to rely on.
Be Honest About State of Love
In the end only the two people in the relationship know what is truly going on so you have to put on your big girl/guy pants and assess your love. If the relationship is working for you and people are simply hating for their own personal reasons, then keep doing you. However, if when you close your eyes at night you see some of the things that your family continues to point out to you and secretly you think they may have a point then don't run away from their disdain --- embrace it as a warning sign that things can get much worse and it is time to get out now!
LaDawn Black is a relationship expert, author and media personality. Cocoa Mommalicious is her forum for sharing tales from the mommy lines, love lines and life lines. For more information visit www.ladawnblack.com .
Monday, May 21, 2012
A Bit About Me......
Oh wow, where exactly do I start? My name is LaDawn Black and for the last ten years I have been building a career as a relationship expert, author and media personality. I have experienced things that many people have only dreamed of: signing with a major publisher, daily radio show in a great market, TV show and major magazine appearances and mixing and mingling with celebs. However, the biggest accomplishment that I am most proud of is my marriage and my three incredible kids. When I started out ten years ago, pros in the industry told me that I would never ever be able to manage a career in entertainment and maintain a family, but we are still here! Not that it is easy, but there is hope.
While my stories on the surface may appear very specific to my career and lifestyle; I think there is a bit of wisdom that we can all get from my mania. The truth is being a mommy and trying to be a hot mommy is a universal --- how the heck do you do it? Every day I hope to share with you a bit of my journey as a mom, wife and love guru, relationship tips and insights and my take on stories of the day so that we can all learn and grow together :) Let's see where this takes us ...........
LaDawn Black is a relationship expert, author and media personality. Cocoa Mommalicious is her forum for sharing tales from the mommy lines, love lines and life lines. For more information visit www.ladawnblack.com .
While my stories on the surface may appear very specific to my career and lifestyle; I think there is a bit of wisdom that we can all get from my mania. The truth is being a mommy and trying to be a hot mommy is a universal --- how the heck do you do it? Every day I hope to share with you a bit of my journey as a mom, wife and love guru, relationship tips and insights and my take on stories of the day so that we can all learn and grow together :) Let's see where this takes us ...........
LaDawn Black is a relationship expert, author and media personality. Cocoa Mommalicious is her forum for sharing tales from the mommy lines, love lines and life lines. For more information visit www.ladawnblack.com .
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